


No One to Nothing

by lakesandquarries



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: M/M, Ouma not Oma, OumaMonth2020, Post-Game, based on a prompt, happy birthday kokichi i hope u like being sad, oumonth2020, this is entirely self indulgent, vr au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-06-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:53:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24581866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lakesandquarries/pseuds/lakesandquarries
Summary: From a sentence prompt meme: “There are only so many times I can watch you break before I start to crack.” Also for ouma month, fiction vs reality and truth vs lie.The killing game wasn't real, but the repercussions are.
Relationships: Momota Kaito/Oma Kokichi
Comments: 5
Kudos: 150
Collections: Kokichi Ouma Month





	No One to Nothing

Ouma’s sitting on the edge of the roof, shoes off and legs dangling. He doesn’t respond as Kaito approaches, even when he drops down next to him and says, “Ouma?”

The silence is overwhelming. There’s no houses around them, no real buildings except for the hospital they’re on top of. When Kaito looks up, the sky is clear.

“Ouma,” Kaito says again.

“Do you think that’s my real name?” he asks. He’s staring straight ahead, at something on the horizon Kaito can’t see. 

“What?”

Ouma still doesn’t look at him. “Ouma Kokichi,” he says, quietly. “Sounds nice, doesn’t it? Very meaningful. Fits my character. I wonder where it came from.” He turns, finally, but the empty look in his eyes makes Kaito wish he’d look away again. “Momota-chan.” His voice is as blank as his expression. “Do you think you’re a real person?”

“What the fuck are you talking about? Of course I am. We both are.”

Ouma swings his legs, looking back over the horizon. “Hm,” he says. 

“Ouma,” Kaito says. He can’t stop staring at Ouma’s face. He can’t stop thinking about his face in the hangar, sweaty and clammy, about to die and aware of it and  _ okay _ with it. 

That Ouma had been scared. This Ouma is empty. 

“Go,” Ouma says. 

“What?”

“Go. Leave. Stop bothering me.”

He’d been so close, in the hangar. He’d started to figure out the truth, started peeling back the layers Ouma covered himself with, and when he’d woken up he’d thought maybe this was his chance. He could help Ouma, like he had Harumaki and Shuichi. 

He’d gone to visit Ouma the day he woke up, and Ouma had stared out the window and ate his food and spoke to the nurses and did everything in his power to pretend Kaito didn’t exist. 

And now, the first words Ouma has spoken to him since they woke up, and it’s to question his own existence. 

“In the hangar,” Kaito starts, immediately interrupted by Ouma’s laughter. He’s heard Ouma laugh before - incessant giggling just to be annoying, mocking laughter as he made fun of someone, the rare genuine snort at a comment someone made - but this is new. It’s dry. Empty. Like his eyes. 

“It doesn’t matter,” Ouma says. “It wasn’t real, Momota-chan.” His legs kick back and forth, thumping against the building. 

“I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about -”

“That was fake too!” He looks at Kaito, beaming at him, and for a second Kaito is in the game again, watching Ouma antagonize his classmates with that insufferable smile. “It’s all fake, Momota-chan. Even us! It wasn’t real, and it didn’t matter, and -”

“Shut  _ up _ ,” Kaito growls, running a hand through his hair. “It wasn’t fake, Ouma. I meant it when I -”

“Don’t lie to me,” Ouma says. The smile has vanished, replaced by that emptiness - and then it appears again, fast as blinking. “Who were you really thinking about? Was it Harukawa-chan?”

“No,” Kaito says. His mouth tastes like ash. “No, I -”

“Saihara-chan? I wasn’t sure if you swung that way!”

“No! I was -”

“Ohhh, you’re making this hard. Akamatsu-chan? No, you wouldn’t do that to Saihara-chan, would you. Hm. Someone else, then. Ooh, was it Iruma-chan? That would be -”

“It was  _ you, _ you idiot! Is it really that hard to think that maybe I give a shit about you? That maybe I felt bad that I was about to watch you  _ die? _ ” The words tear out of him, louder than he’d meant to speak. Ouma stares at him, leaning away from Kaito, face blank except for the slightest twitch in his eyebrow.

“I told you, don’t -”

“I’m not lying! I’m not like you, Ouma. I’m not a liar like you are. When I kiss someone, I mean it, even if -”

“Even if it’s me?” 

“Yes! Even if it’s you! Fuck,  _ especially _ if it’s you!”

Ouma stares at him. His legs have stilled, along with the rest of him - even his chest looks like it’s barely moving.

“I - you were  _ dying _ , Ouma.” Kaito clenches his hand into a fist. Releases it. Clenches it again. “We both were.”

Kaito reaches a hand out. Slowly, he reaches towards Ouma, who has yet to move. 

“I didn’t want you to be alone,” he says, placing his hand on Ouma’s cheek. His skin is cold. frozen like the rest of him. 

For a moment, Ouma is still, not blinking, barely breathing. And then he explodes into motion, wrenching his face away from Kaito’s grasp, jumping to his feet and frantically scooting backwards across the roof until there’s about three feet of distance between him and Kaito. His breathing, barely perceptible a moment ago, has quickened into hyperventilation. 

“Don’t,” he says, voice ragged. “Don’t touch me, don’t - don’t -”

Kaito’s hand is still hanging in midair. “I wasn’t - I just -”

“ _Shut_ _up_!” Ouma shouts. Kaito’s hand drops, and suddenly he’s the one on his feet and scooting backwards, alarmed by the sudden shift. “It doesn’t matter! The game, the hangar, now, none of it! It’s not _real!_ Whatever reason you had to kiss me, it doesn’t matter!” It’s a shock, seeing Ouma like this. Gone is the supervillain, the dramatic movements and practiced words and exaggerated grace. There’s no cape for him to swish theatrically, no hat to tip - he’s not even wearing shoes. His eyes are screwed shut and his fists are clenched so tight his knuckles have gone completely white, and all Kaito can think is he looks like a kid. 

“You don’t know me. You don’t care about me. You  _ can’t. _ ” He opens his eyes, gaze pointed right at Kaito, and it’s like getting shot by the crossbow all over again. This Ouma is one he’s never seen before. This Ouma has his fingers in his hair, shaking visibly as he clings to purple locks. “This isn’t - I’m supposed to be  _ dead _ ,” he says, the last word closer to a whisper. “I’m supposed to be dead, and they’re supposed to be  _ safe _ , and -”

Kaito scooches closer, inching his way towards Ouma. “Ouma,” he says, as gently as he’s capable of. “I’m glad you’re not dead.”

Ouma bursts into laughter. 

“You’re an idiot,” he says. He’s still shaking. It’s cold up on the roof, and Ouma’s dressed in thin hospital scrubs and nothing else, and before Kaito can think about it he’s peeling off his jacket and draping it over Ouma’s shoulders. Ouma doesn’t fight him, just stares at the dark purple fabric, slowly moving his hand to grip the sleeve. 

“I can’t keep watching you do this,” Kaito says. 

“Then don’t watch.” Ouma rolls his shoulders, letting the coat drop. “I’m not one of your sidekicks. I don’t need you to fix me.”

“That’s not -”

Ouma’s smile is brittle. He takes a step forward, pushing his face close to Kaito’s. “I told you not to lie to me, Momota-chan. You feel sorry for me, right? Poor sad lonely little Kokichi. I’m broken, just like all your other projects, and if you devote yourself to fixing me you don’t have to think about your own problems.”

“I never said you were broken,” Kaito says. This close, he can see the flecks of pink in Ouma’s eyes, the hints of freckles on his cheeks. 

“What would you do,” Ouma says, stepping closer again, reaching out to cling onto Kaito’s overshirt, “if I jumped off the roof?”

“ _ Excuse me? _ ” Kaito grabs Ouma’s hands, and this time he doesn’t flinch away. “I - I’d stop you! Obviously! What the hell are you saying?”

“It’s funny,” Ouma muses. “You hated me so much, and then you kill me and suddenly you think we’re best friends.”

“You - you’re not making any sense.” He’s still holding Ouma’s hands. He’s scared to let go. “Look, I - I misjudged you. You’re a dick, yeah, but under all that -”

“Momota-chan, you can’t be  _ that _ stupid. We’ve been over this before! Underneath all this -” Kaito still has his hands gripped tight, so Ouma dips his head down to try and gesture to himself - “There’s nothing! It’s lies, all the way down.”

“You’re wrong,” Kaito says. “Ouma, you - you’re -”

“I’m nothing, Momota-chan.” The cheerful expression on his face is the worst part of it. “You can’t fix something that doesn’t exist.”

“I’m fucking  _ holding you! _ ” Kaito shouts, shaking Ouma’s wrist. “Stop giving me this shit about how you don’t exist! You’re real.  _ I’m _ real. And I - I’m not gonna pretend you’re some great person, but I’m not gonna just stand here and listen to you act like you’re not even a human being. You’re Ouma Kokichi, and you’re alive, and you’re a person, I am going to stand here and yell it until it sinks in!”

The smile is gone, but Ouma isn’t blank, either. His eyebrows are furrowed together, lips parted slightly, and Kaito thinks about the way they’d felt on his own. 

“In the hangar,” he says, softer, “the kiss, it - it meant something. I don’t know what, but, I’m gonna figure it out.  _ We’re  _ gonna figure it out.”

Ouma surges forward, and Kaito matches him. The lack of blood makes it a little more pleasant this time around, sweeter, kinder. A beginning, rather than an end. 

A second chance, he thinks. For him and for Ouma. 

Ouma pulls back, just enough to breathe. “You’re an idiot,” he says, but the cruelty is gone from his voice. He sounds almost soft _.  _ “You are the stupidest person I have ever met.”

“Yeah, whatever. Can we go inside?”

Kaito had forgotten he was holding Ouma’s hands until the moment Ouma slips out of his grasp, ducking down to grab Kaito’s jacket from the floor and wrapping it around himself. 

“You’re still wrong, you know,” Ouma stays, striding towards the roof access door without waiting for Kaito, who doesn’t waste a moment to catch up. 

“We’ll see about that,” Kaito says. 

**Author's Note:**

> i tried to get the sentence in there!! i really did!!! i hope the two people who requested it can still enjoy it.
> 
> title from "no one to nothing" by mother mother.
> 
> follow me on tumblr at lakesandquarries and maybe consider checking out some of the petitions and other things i reblog.
> 
> thank you for reading!


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